Is anxiety a choice?

So I do one of two things when I feel anxious...stand my ground to control the situation no matter who I piss off and no matter what the consequences until I "win" (not really winning when I make people angry, hurt their feelings, or end up creating unnecessary drama in my life) or I completely just let it all go to the point of ignoring things hoping they will disappear (this doesn't really work either as usually the problem just gets bigger, more pressing, or overwhelming...and I eventually have to deal with it anyway). I am either completely stubborn or just say screw it and take a nap neither of which really works in the long run.
I mentioned previously that one of my kids was really struggling to make a decision about school and whether to stay where she is and unhappy or move to the public school. Either is probably a fine choice although both have consequences both good and bad. I am terrified to make the wrong choice and terrified to let her make the choice because afterall I'm her mom and I should know the "right" answer all the time...right? Additionally, if she makes the choice then I am not in control and we all know that control is my thing. Well in this case, I'm not sure there is a "right" answer. We have both wavered and contemplated, and I have prayed and stewed, and today we had no choice but to just make the choice since school starts next week. Now the anxiety sets in...I am terrified I have guided her in the wrong direction, I am terrified we will be judged for making this choice, I am terrified that she will hate the choice she made and be unhappy, I am terrified that it will be a great choice and we will have spent all this time and energy crying over something very insignificant in the big picture. My first reaction was to just ignore it and take a nap, a lot of long naps (and what did it get me...nothing because I had to wake up and deal with it anyway), then my reaction was to just be mad about anything and everything even the color of backpack she picked (and what did that get me...nothing but my daughter's hurt feelings), and now my reaction is again to just pretend it isn't happening and maybe tomorrow it will not feel so scary and overwhelming. Although going to enroll her in school is going to be scary and overwhelming so I can surmise that tomorrow will bring with it a lot of anxiety of its own.
Funny how I am anxious a lot of times just about becoming anxious.
Why do I write these blogs? I write them because the tornado in my brain becomes dizzy-ing and when I write these things it forces me to focus this tornado into a straight line wind with a purpose.
Yesterday, I almost missed out on a great opportunity. We were invited to spend some time at a friend's lake house with some other friends and the kids. I already had planned all the reasons why we shouldn't go. I don't know why, I love hanging out with these people and I knew we would have fun. But it just seemed easier to stay home because home is safe. Home, nobody judges me; home is easy. I kept asking Shawn if he was too tired to go and hoping he would say yes (he had every right to say yes afterall he only slept 6 hours in 48) but he wanted to go. I was literally sick all the way there and I wanted to throw up. I don't know why but I was just anxious. We ended up having an awesome time, which I knew we would. It is times like that I wish I could just get up in the morning, be excited at what was to come, and enjoy my day...my whole day start to finish rather than spending 3 days anticipating all the things that could be horrible about a day.
So maybe tomorrow I can wake up and be excited about what this change could mean for our family and my daughter instead of agonizing about all the things that could go wrong. Yes...that is what I will do...wait I'm not sure I have a choice or I would always choose to take that route. Is anxiety a choice? If it's a choice, can someone please tell me how to make better choices?